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Hexagram 13 · Line 5

First Weeping, Then Laughter

Hexagram 13 · Line 5 meaning

"Those bound in fellowship first weep and lament — afterward they laugh. After great struggle, they succeed in meeting."
Parent hexagram
13

T'ung Jên is the hexagram of true fellowship: fire blazing upward toward heaven, many flames with one direction. It concerns the bonds that make great undertakings possible — the crossing of great waters that no one crosses alone.

Direct answer

Hexagram 13 line 5 means two people who belong together are separated by life's obstacles, and the separation is real grief. But a bond rooted in inner truth outlasts every obstacle: the reunion comes, and the weeping turns to laughter. Be patient; hold no one as an adversary; abandon defensive attitudes and keep a fair, generous view of the other's shortcomings. What's genuinely united cannot be kept apart — the struggle is part of the meeting.

The image explained

The fifth line is the ruler's place, and it holds the hexagram's most emotionally complete image: first the weeping, then the laughter, the meeting won only after great struggle. The grief is not minimised — the separation of two who belong together is a genuine sorrow, and the line lets it be one. But it frames that sorrow inside a larger certainty: a bond founded on inner truth has a durability the obstacles don't. Distance, misunderstanding, circumstance — these can delay the meeting and make it cost something, but they can't finally prevent it. The struggle isn't the enemy of the reunion; it's part of it, the thing the eventual laughter is measured against. What the line asks of you in the meantime is to keep the bond clean: no adversary-making, no defensiveness, a generous eye toward the other's faults.

What to do now

Do hold the faith that a true bond survives its obstacles, while letting the grief of the separation be real — you don't have to pretend the distance doesn't hurt. Be patient through the struggle rather than forcing a premature reunion or concluding the bond is broken. Crucially, keep the connection uncontaminated while you wait: don't cast the other person as an adversary, drop the defensive posture, and keep a fair, generous view of their shortcomings rather than building a case against them. The meeting comes after the struggle, not instead of it — so guard the relationship's inner truth through the hard stretch, and let the weeping run its course toward the laughter that genuinely belongs together people always eventually reach.

Transformation

The change toward Hexagram 30

When this line moves, the situation travels toward Hexagram 30, The Clinging, Fire — flame that has no body of its own and lives by clinging to what sustains it, clarity kept alight by devotion to the inexhaustible. The link is what carries the weeping through to laughter: the bond outlasts every obstacle because it clings to inner truth, the one fuel that doesn't run out. The change tells you to feed the fire faithfully — cling to the enduring truth of the connection rather than to the transient obstacles or your own grievances. Tend it with the careful, humble devotion the Clinging asks, and the flame of the bond outlasts the separation, burning steadily until the reunion.

This line in context
In love

what belongs together is separated and grieving — but a bond rooted in truth outlasts every obstacle. The reunion comes. Full love reading

In career

a valued partnership or alliance is disrupted and it stings. Keep faith and stay generous; a bond built on real substance re-forms after the struggle. Full career reading

For a decision

don't write off a true connection over present obstacles. Hold it cleanly through the struggle; what genuinely belongs together meets again. Full timing reading

Reflection

Am I feeding the enduring truth of this bond, or clinging to the obstacles and grievances?

Where do I need to drop the adversary-making and keep a generous view while I wait?

Read this line well

Keep the line inside the full reading

A changing line becomes useful when you read it in the right order and keep it tied to the wider hexagram pattern.

1. Start with Hexagram 13

Read the parent hexagram first so Line 5 stays anchored in the actual situation rather than floating as a detached slogan.

2. Stay with Line 5

Let this line show where the pressure, correction, or opening is most active right now. It is usually the sharpest instruction in the cast.

3. Then read the direction of change

Only after that should you compare the transformed figure and decide what movement this changing line is pointing toward.

If you want the wider method behind this sequence, read how to consult the I Ching or go deeper with the changing-lines guide.

All six lines

Read the full line sequence

Line 1

Fellowship at the Gate

"Fellowship begins at the gate, in the open. No blame."

Hexagram 13 line 1 means union starts on the doorstep, in full view, before anything has been assumed. Examine the foundations early: unstated conditions, hidden presumptions, unspoken expectations on either side — these must be brought into the light now, while it's easy. Approach without secret aims, hold to what's correct, and if you're not met with receptiveness, remain reserved rather than forcing your views. Care at the threshold spares the whole relationship.

Read line 1 in full
Line 2

Fellowship in the Clan

"Fellowship confined to one's own clan: humiliation."

Hexagram 13 line 2 is the warning against faction. Aligning only with your own kind — by interest, habit, family, or flattery — feels comfortable and costs you the larger truth. Cliques breed self-serving habits and contempt for outsiders, and factional thinking ends in the humiliation of a bond that stood for nothing universal. Correct your behaviour, put aside petty differences, and measure every alliance against what's universally sound rather than what merely serves the group.

Read line 2 in full
Line 3

Weapons in the Thicket

"He hides weapons in the thicket and climbs the high hill to watch. For three years he does not rise up."

Hexagram 13 line 3 means distrust armed and waiting: motives concealed, defences prepared, the other party surveilled from a height. Where suspicion hides weapons, genuine meeting becomes impossible for years at a time. Inwardly, this is the ego fortifying its doubts — convinced betrayal is coming, unable to commit to openness, mistaking vigilance for wisdom. The stalemate can't be attacked; it can only be dissolved, by patiently abandoning the hidden arsenal and returning to sincerity.

Read line 3 in full
Line 4

On the Wall, Unable to Attack

"He climbs his wall but cannot bring himself to attack. Good fortune."

Hexagram 13 line 4 means estrangement — but with conscience intact. Separation and misunderstanding have raised walls, yet something in you refuses to press the quarrel, and that refusal is the good fortune. The inability to attack is the beginning of reconciliation: difficulties work on both parties, softening positions. Hold your principles, don't abandon the relationship, and let the deadlock do its quiet work of turning both sides back toward union.

Read line 4 in full
Line 5

First Weeping, Then Laughter

"Those bound in fellowship first weep and lament — afterward they laugh. After great struggle, they succeed in meeting."

Hexagram 13 line 5 means two people who belong together are separated by life's obstacles, and the separation is real grief. But a bond rooted in inner truth outlasts every obstacle: the reunion comes, and the weeping turns to laughter. Be patient; hold no one as an adversary; abandon defensive attitudes and keep a fair, generous view of the other's shortcomings. What's genuinely united cannot be kept apart — the struggle is part of the meeting.

Current line
Line 6

Fellowship in the Meadow

"Fellowship in the open meadow. No remorse."

Hexagram 13 line 6 means fellowship without intimacy: shared ground, goodwill, but not yet the deep union of hearts. This isn't failure — there's no remorse in it. Release your remaining doubts, embrace the path as far as it goes, and find peace in connection at whatever depth the time allows. Even the outer meadow of fellowship, honestly kept, is a good place to stand — and from it, deeper union remains possible.

Read line 6 in full
Situation meanings

Read this hexagram in context

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Oracle

Consult the I Ching with Hexagram 13 in mind

If Line 5 is active in your reading, use the oracle to revisit the full pattern and any additional changing lines in your live situation.